25 man Malygos

Raided today with my new guild, it was a very disheartening experience. it seems that it is the Jehovah's Witness of raiding .oO(there is only one true way convert or be dammed, don't listen to the view of the "Worldly People"). I don't know how long I can keep raiding with them, today marks my second raid with them and already I'm counting down the secons to raid end.

PolyVic Social

I went to the Polyamorous Victoria Social last night which I think was the best one I'd been to...... EVER! People actually talked to me .oO(I mean real conversations). and a partner of the friend I blogged about earlier acknowledged our existence.

Lancefeild

Went to Lancefeild yesterday for about an hour, I was so cold, I went there for a car/bike show and swap-meet .oO(well I didn't go for the swap-meet but it was a part of the event). It started a 8:00am but I wasn't that keen so I got there at 11:00 and they were packing up. the guys at the gate were still happy to take my $5 though. So I got a couple of photos before all the cars had gone, which froze my ears off .oO(and gave me a monster head ache), and went home.

Living with the In-Laws

Spent a couple of days at the in-laws place just spending some quality family time. I don't mind spending time with my in-laws most of the time .oO(some times there eccentricities grate on me), it just wears me out sometimes as I am an introvert who has no time alone to recharge.

Polyamory Activism

I decided to email the list and see if there was anything that I could volunteer on in the way of poly activism. I have had a couple of replies, one was telling me about all things volunteering, one was positive saying that there is nothing at the moment but if people wanted to they could start something up .oO(to which I replied that I'd love to, I just need some guidance), and a lovely negative post which pretty much said that they tried a couple of years ago and it didn't work.

Work

I worked yesterday. I did a full day of rollout .oO(8am-5:30pm) for HP, It was grueling for such an out of shape person as myself, so I've decided to get a bit fitter.

PolyVic Discussion Group

I went to the PolyVic discussion group on Tuesday night. I have been meaning to blog about it since but have not found the appropriate time when I have been comfortable to do so. Well now is as good a time as any. I was so sick with anxiety before going, so sick infact that it was difficult to keep my dinner down. Before anyone asks I did not ask about activism mayhaps I'll start a tad impersonal and post to the list. Anyway there was only a few of us .oO(mayhaps 11 or so) on account of Confest being on the Easter long-weekend, there were some die-hards who came to the meeting straight from Confest, we had one newcomer who I hope felt welcome. The topics included but were not limited to "what polyamory means" and that opened up "what it means to us", also we discussed "what would be your ideal poly home" and "weather our idea of poly has changed over time".

Easter Lunch/Dinner thing

I went to an easter dinner that was held at 4:30pm, strange time for a dinner, and again I just felt like the fifth wheel. I know I have to go to these things for it to feel more comfortable but how long is it going to take. I just feel like an outsider everywhere.

The Carlton Blues :(

My team lost last night and I could feel it affecting me I got so disheartened and sad. I'm not sure why it affected me so, as it is just a game. Mayhaps it was a little of the the lost and the fact that my dad had call that morning.

Poker Rules

Just played a 7 handed home game of texas hold 'em. I won and am so ecstatic all my watching poker on TV and playing poker on my PSP has paid off. It was awesome, the game went down to heads up vs my wife so we actually won both first and second place prize money. "What are we going to do with the money?" well for one pay back the shopping money that we borrowed from to play and invest in our entry to the next poker night.

What is it that I am meant to be doing?

I have a knot in my stomach that makes me feel ill. it feels like I am meant to be doing something and that time is running out but I don't know what it is I should be doing or how long I have left.

Good on Centrelink!

WOW! I never thought I'd ever say that. Centrelink have decided to acknowledge same sex partnerships. Now if only they would acknowledge Polyamorous cohabitation the world would look a little fairer.

What Is the Polyamorous Community Doing?

I am at odds with the poly community, although I am just a surface dweller .oO(as I am not engaged freely in poly relations and am a shy anxiety ridden introvert who I guess people think sits in the corner and talks to no one because he wants to) it seems that they are focused on in house events or queer events when it is the community at large that are not accepting. I think I will raise the idea of Polyamory Activism at the next meeting this Tuesday. I understand that they made a 6 minute doco, I also understand that this oportunity fell in their lap and has only been shown at poly functions and a queer film festavles which in my belief is just preaching to the choir. I understand that outing yourself to the wider community would be a difficult decision to make but why make a documentry in the first place if not to educate people.

Relationship Book

I am currently reading The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. It is a good, although the religious references got on my nerves a little but I just took them as fictional anecdotes to explain what he mean.

Why am I reading this book? Well it is simple I am somewhat retarded when it come to showing my affection, or atleast I believe, so I grabbed this book and started reading it because I want my wife to know how much I love her and I don't think I've been doing a good job of it.

"So what are these five languages?" I here you ask. Well they are Quality Time, Words of affirmation, Gifts, Acts of service, and Physical Touch. So I am ploughing through this book at a great rate .oO(well for me anyway) and picking up pointers and I can see that the languages that I am weak on may just be the Languages that my wife most strongly understands. I have a lot more to learn from this book and a lot more work to do in my relationship.

I recommend having a pen and notepad close handy if your reading this book for the ideas that it gives and it also suggests a portable notepad for when you are with your partner to keep notes on ideas you have or the ones that are subtly hinted .oO(i'm still no good with subtle).

Friends and Polyamory

Why is it so dificult to be friends with poly people? I guess it is because they are almost always available. I was getting to know this poly person and we're, in my eyes, becoming friends. I then get a text telling me that they are interested in me as more than friends (now just to clear things up, I am of the opinion that I am poly. I have however entered into an agreement with my wife to not enter into another relationship until she does. This is because it is percieved, and to an extent true, that in the past it has been easier for me to enter into another relationship.) to which I replied that although I am interested I have an agreement with my wife and that I'd love to remain friends. Since then they have avoided me like the plague with mayhaps a wave or a smile here or there. When confronted I was told that she was just giving my wife space, space I believe was not needed because we were all getting along just fine, and how long is this space meant to last as it has been atleast two months. So again I ask "Why is it so difficult to be friends with poly people?"